


My Sunshine

by Suuushisu



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Attempted Murder, Bullying, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pre-Game Oma Kokichi, Pre-Game Personalities (New Dangan Ronpa V3), Pre-Game Saihara Shuichi, Stalking, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-09
Packaged: 2020-07-29 23:02:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20090233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Suuushisu/pseuds/Suuushisu
Summary: Shuichi Saihara has never been a boy of fascination. Nothing seems to make him happy anymore. Nothing seems to entertain him anymore. Nothing but the popular killing series: Danganronpa.Just when he wanted to dedicate himself on writing his own theories about the ongoing season of the series, he was hit by luck.





	1. Hit by luck

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys. Just wanted to let you know that this is my very first english fanfiction. My grammar and words might come of poorly since english isn't my first language.
> 
> I still hope you kinda,,,, enjoy :,)

"Class dismissed. See you tomorrow."  
In a hurry the teacher put her stuff together and left with a short "bye".  
This wasn't unusual, since everyone knew the teacher wanted to go as soon as possible aswell. She didn't even bother on cleaning the chalkboard, since the same class are going to be in the same classroom while attending the same lessons tomorrow anyways.  
  
"Wanna hang out today?"  
The girls voice reached the boy, Shuichi Saihara, sitting to his desk while spacing out. He jumped a little bit, startled from being ripped back to reality. He got lost while thinking about Danganronpa again. His hands reached his black cap and pulled it down, making an effort not to look into the eyes of the girl. Hiding his golden eyes, if his black hair wasn't enough to hide it already. But he didn't care.  
  
"Can't. I have to go home. My parents are gonna come back from their business trip today.", he answered with an uninterested tone, still not looking into her pink eyes. The girl proceeded to kneel down, leaning on his desk to get a proper look for his eyes. She'd always be persistent on trying to get the gloomy boy to hang out, like when they were little children. And this is exactly what she always does, whenever Shuichi declined her offer. She would try to look at him with big puppy eyes.  
But she rarely ever accomplished to convience this boy, ever since he got used to that tactic of her. He didn't care about trying to hang out with her anyways.  
  
"Hm... I guess this can't be helped. But let me know, if you wanna hang out! You have my number, so text me, Shuichi!"  
  
The blonde girl stands up, patting her skirt clean and exits the classroom, leaving the boy all by himself. A silent sigh pressed beneath her breath when she reached to grab the doorknob.  
As soon as the girl left, he made a move.  
While grabbing his black backpack with a Monokuma-pin on it, he left his classroom and shut the door softly. He just didn't really care, even when his longest friend seemed to be upset about his behavior.  


  
Shuichi took a seat on a bench, next to a baseball field. Usually he would be roaming around on the rooftop and writing down his Danganronpa theories but since they locked the door to the roof, he had to find himself another place to be. ALso, he didn't really wanted to go home right now. He didn't care if his parents got home today, since it doesn't matter. Even if they aren't home, he would still be roaming around school and not go home as long as possible. And so he found a lonely bench next to a baseball field. He then starts dedicating himself into writing his theories about Danganronpa. The only thing he cared about.  
  
"Watch out!!"  
A baseball came flying towards Shuichi. Just barely he moved to avoid an impact with the flying ball. But he still didn't manage to get out of the way, so the ball just bounces against his left cheek.  
The impact sent his cap flying while Shuichi maintained his stand. His tender hands grabbing his left cheek. It got warm and red while pain was spreading at the area of his left cheek.  
And not long after, the whole baseball-team went over to look for the injured Shuichi. Just checking out what happened.  
  
"I am so sorry!", the batter yelled while the coach pushed some players aside to move forward to the injured. A strong smell of cigarettes and old clothing drills into Shuichis nose, when the coach approaches him. _Feels like puking_.  
"Doesn't look too bad... still..." He moved his head upwards and screamed a name, even when Shuichi insisted he was fine.  
"Ouma-kun! Bring this boy to the nurse!"  
  
The baseball players all moved aside, letting a short boy with plum-colored hair step forward. Some even left already since there wasn't anything interesting to see anymore.  
_You all hoped to see blood, huh? Pathetic._  
With a cold stare he watched the players leaving when a really silent voice was talking to him. Actually he didn't even pay attention to the voice, he was just too pissed to. But since he didn't want to stand out in this whole situation- or anywhere else, he just let his anger boil inside of him.  
That's why he let the short boy do his job and let himself get dragged to the nurse, leaving all his stuff behind for now.  
_I have to go back and grab my stuff? Should have taken them with me._  
  
"...for the others and I hope you're not mad..."  
Shuichi let out a sigh while the short boy was talking. Actually he wasn't even trying to listen to the shorter one, since his mind kinda drifted away to Danganronpa again. He didnt really gave any answers to the boy, just nodding and some "mhm"-s. Which made the short boy really uncomfortable.  
_But why should I care? I dont care at all. Ugh._  
  
Finally, he glances to the shorter one. Plum-colored, soft looking hair. Little cute nose. Almost snow white skin.  
His eyes weren't visible since his bangs were blocking the view to them. But still... somehow he doens't look real to be human. More like...  
"Are you a doll?", Shuichi asked. Actually intended to asking himself in his own mind.  
_Oops. Hah, who cares? I already asked, so I might aswell get an answer._  
  
The boy flinches to his question and glances up to the taller one.  
"A... A doll? No, I am... I am real...?"  
  
Then gold eyes meet violet. Just staring at them had Shuichi losing himself into the beauty color of the eyes, which are matching to his hair. Shuichi had catched a glimpse on his pink tongue inside his cute little mouth while the boy was speaking. But Shuichi didn't hear him. His fascination for the boy grew too large and was overwhelming. He felt like the world around him got a lot more colorful and happier. Not gray and gloomy. Colorful. Happy. Beautiful.  
_He definetly looks like a doll._  
  
"...P-please! Y-Your hand! I am really not a doll!"  
  
Shuichi snapped back into reality when hearing the pleading of the short boy. Realizing he had moved his hand onto the soft cheek of the boy, Shuichi slowly removes them while maintaining his glance at the now flustered boy.  
Now, at second glance, Shuichi noticed that the boy wasn't wearing anything dedicating him for practicing baseball.  
_Was he just helping out?_  
Instead, he was wearing the black school uniform from their school.  
_Probably just helping out, yeah. What did the coach say his name was? I forgot... I should have paid more attention_.  
  
The first time in forever, Shuichi found something that interests him. How weird... this boy. This cute boy. Who was he? What is this feeling inside of him? Why does it feel like that? Why does it feel so good?  
Shuichi knew, the answer would lie inside this boy. He knew, he would need this boy, if he wanted the world around him to shine and spark again. He wanted him. He needed him.  
_He will be mine._  
  
"What's your name?"  
  
A soft smile was decorating Shuichis face. A smile, which he almost forgot, how to do.


	2. Is Oma Kokichi here?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello :)  
Thanks for the kudos, I appreciate them a lot and it also motivated me on writing! Also, I made a few mistakes in the last chapter but fixed them. I am not sure if I got all the mistakes tho.  
Anyways, have fun reading.

“Kokichi Ouma.”  
That was the name of the boy Shuichi met after school. Kokichi was too sweet to be real, if Shuichi was being honest. He helped him out, when he got a baseball smashed to his face the day they met.

_Even if he was just helping out because the coach told him to… but still! He was so sweet!_

Tiny, soft hands nursing his in pain burning cheek. Soft locks of purple hair brushing against his shoulders when Kokichi moved to lean near Shuichi, when he inspected the injury. Flinching violet eyes when they met with golden. That little blush when he turned away embarrassed for leaning up to the taller boy. And then this smile. This one smile, when Shuichi asked for his name. Kokichi was too embarrassed but still managed to give the other boy a soft smile when he was asked for his name.

  
This all happened when Kokichi was just putting a coolpack on Shuichis cheek. He never would have imagined that such a short time spending with someone can feel… so good. Shuichi even forgot to go back to the field to grab his stuff. Later, on the same day, he went back to school just for that and cursing his clumsiness.  
But he didn’t regret sitting there. Just thanks to him sitting there and get himself being hit by this flying baseball made it possible for him to meet such an angel.

_What am I saying? He is gonna be MY angel._

The days after their meeting, Kokichi and Shuichi would pass each other a few times at school, both greeting the other. Actually, if possible, Shuichi would try to see him much more often but since he didn’t want to come of to suspicious to Kokichi, he decided to hold back.

  
_You can’t tell me, that me being present on the baseball field while Kokichi was there helping out, wasn’t a sign of fate. We are meant to be together. Even if he’s in the other class. But that is EXACTLY why fate wanted us to meet there. I am going to use that fate, for it not to become a waste, and try getting closer to Kokichi._

* * *

“Now, look at this.” A phone was put in front of Kokichi by another student in his class. Kokichi didn’t really wanted to look at what was about to be shown on the screen. He just wanted to enjoy his lunch. The student gave Kokichi a warm smile but Kokichi would never look at his smile because the lilac goatee was just always distracting him. They weren’t exactly friends, which is why Kokichi was automatically suspicious when the phone suddenly appeared in front of his face when he didn’t expect the student to talk to him.

  
The goatee-student clicked on the play-button on his phone screen. The cracked screen of the phone was facing the small boy. His eyes tear open and the purple color of his eyes reflected bright red when he got a glimpse on the phone screen.

  
“W-why would you show me that?! Put this away, this is… embarrassing…”, Kokichi spoke and facing away from the screen. He was even more embarrassed as he noticed that his voice became more silent to the end of the sentence. He never manages to speak very loudly and he never understood how some people could just talk very loud without being embarrassed in the end.

“Whaaat? This is just some guys fucking a girl! Haha, what? Don’t tell me you never watched porn!”  
The student and his friends started to burst into an ugly laughter while trying to imitate Kokichis embarrassed reaction. Kokichi himself didn’t exactly do anything about the other students mocking him. It wasn’t exactly true. He watched porn once, since which teenage boy wouldn’t? But he was admitting, he wasn’t comfortable with it. He was too embarrassed and never watched it again. How could people do such intimate act while being filmed?

  
Kokichis mind was still showing him the picture on the phone of the lilac goatee-student. A naked beautiful brunette in a completely red room. She was on the bed riding a guy while others forced their disgusting dicks inside her mouth, demanding her to take it in her mouth or stroking it with her hand. Kokichi didn’t exactly count how many people were present on set but he knew, more than one person was definitely too much!

“Hey! Stop being such an asshole to Kokichi, goddamn goatee!”

Kokichi flinched again as he heard a familiar voice calling his name. He was immediately rising his head looking for the owner of the voice.  
His glance stopped by the entrance of the classroom. A tall figure stood there, his green hair was kinda messy, implying that he must have been doing some rough movements before he got here. On both of his ears were earrings and his hands were covered with expensive jewellery and bracelets.

Without hesitation Kokichi called to the tall, green figure with a nervous tone to his voice.

“Amami-kun!”

  
The students, who once were laughing their asses off, were now just glancing over to the door, facing towards Amami Rantaro as he made his way towards Kokichi and the students mocking him.

  
“My fucking name isn’t goatee, stupid fuck. Can’t remember my name? I am Momota fucking Kaito. And aren’t you supposed to be with your girl? I thought you guys wanted to fuck in the library.”, bluntly the goatee-dude, Momota Kaito, asked Rantaro. Kaitos friends went silent, as well as the whole class. They knew, whenever these two start to fight, there was no ending to it. Mostly because of Kokichi. One cares too much for him and one just had fun messing around with him. Kokichi would always blame himself when Rantaro ends up getting hurt or when he had to hurt others. Even though Rantaro told him that it isn’t his fault. Rantaro stated that he wanted to protect Kokichi at all costs, which also means he had to hurt others or get hurt in the process.

  
“Don’t worry about me, I am fine, Amami-kun…”, Kokichi stated.  
He wasn’t getting a harsh treatment like he would always get. Mocking Kokichi was actually a very soft treat when Kaito is involved. But it didn’t seem like Rantaro cared how soft the treatment was. Rantaro wouldn’t let his friend being treat even like that. And Kaito never seemed to understand that Rantaro would always come running when he is mistreating Kokichi like that.

Perhaps because Kaito likes to mess with both of them, always mocking Kokichi for his pathetic existence and provoking Rantaro into a fight. They would always end up in a tie, when they fight each other. These two either never got to end a fight because a teacher shows up and forcefully separates them, or both of them lie on the ground with bad bruises and injuries. None of them ever managed to beat the other. So everyone assumed that they were both on the same level of strength, which was probably the reason why Kaito always seems to like fighting Rantaro, since he can test his strength on him.

“Yeah, you hear that? Kichi wants to hang out with me, so fuck off, Uglytaro!”, Kaito moved pulled Kokichi by his arm forcefully, making the smaller one silently yelp in confusion._"Kichi...?"_

  
“Let him go, Kaithot…”  
“You didn’t fucking called me Kaithot, you ugly bastard!”  
“What if I did?”

As the two went on with their _dissing-contest_, Kokichi was being held very roughly by Kaito and aswell by Rantaro, who attempted to pull him away from Kaito.

“Stop it already, I am not a doll for you two to push around!”, Kokichi yelled, making both of them go silent for a moment. Just then he realized what he had done, both, Kaito and Rantaro were now glancing intensively at Kokichi who just… _yelled _at them.  
But as soon as anyone could start speaking again they were interrupted by a knock and a soft and loving voice.

“Excuse me, is Oma Kokichi here?”

* * *

“But wait, where are you going? I thought we would eat lunch together! You promised me…”  
Shuichi couldn’t help but just facing away from the fight that was happening on the corridor. The annoying couple, he was passing by at lunch, were fighting. _Again_.

  
_Can’t they just go away and annoy other people with their problems? Don’t they realize they are in public and some people just don’t care about their fight? I miss Kokichi. I hope he is in his classroom right now, I wanna see_ _-_

  
A tall figure bumped into Shuichi, attempting to run away. Shuichi couldn’t help and just moved his head up to give him his cold, glaring eyes.

  
_How dare he interrupts me when I was thinking about my beloved Kokichi?_

  
That is when poisonous green eyes were staring back at him with the same cold feeling that Shuichi gave him. Not one of them falter. They both continued keeping their gaze at each other until a girls voice intervened.

  
“Rantaro, wait!

The taller boys gaze went away from Shuichi, which surprises him. His cold stare went completely away as soon as he faced into the mass of students. Then, he left silently.

_Finally._

Shuichi moved on to his own classroom. Today would be the day he would be asking Kokichi out on… a date?

  
_Would this be considered as a date? Would he even see it as a date? I mean, I am going to ask him to hang out tomorrow, since it’s Friday._

  
His hand scoop out a small package from his backpack. It was as small as a cup and has a cartoony horse pattern printed on the carton. The inside was filled with small treats, like candy and snacks. Of course, Shuichi only choose the ones Kokichi likes.

  
_Of course, as Kokichis lover I am supposed to know what he likes. So I did my research, just for him._

  
Shuichis mind drove away from reality, when he was thinking about Kokichi Oma. This boy… Shuichis only thought, his cute soulmate. He would be in Shuichis arms, snuggling onto him while giving him a shy smile, just like the one he gave him on the day they met. Shuichis hand stroking his soft, purple locks away from his beloved face and stare into the big eyes. Shuichi could stare at them forever. These purple eyes. His thumb would brush Kokichis soft lips before placing his own-

  
_I need to see Kokichi._

  
Quickly he went outside his classroom, moving through the corridors of the big school and finally stopping in front of Kokichis classroom. Excitement overcame Shuichi, when he came near his beloved classroom. He knew, Kokichi would be inside. Hopefully alone, like he always would be.

  
_Of course, nobody really bothers him, whenever I check on him._

  
His knuckle came in contact with the open, dark-wooden door of the classroom as he knocked on them. He didn’t want to just storm into the classroom, where Kokichi was sitting peacefully. No, he wants to see Kokichis innocent smile when their eyes meet.

“Excuse me, is Oma Kokichi here?”

All eyes are on Shuichi now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kaithot
> 
> Iamsorryomg


	3. Do a backflip!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!!!
> 
> This chapter might be triggering for a few of you! It contains reaaaally really bad bullying.  
Dont forget that, if you or someone else is being bullied, please search for help, reach out to people, before it is too late!!

_1_

_2_

_3_

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_7_

_8 _People were standing there around Kokichi but all eyes were on Shuichi. In his hands he still hold onto his small present for his beloved. Shuichi scanned through the whole room for any clues on what was happening. Then, he noticed that Kokichis arm was being held by two people. It didn’t seem like he was being hold gently. The fabric on Kokichis uniform underneath the grip of these people were showing a clear sign of resistance.

Rage build up upon Shuichi. Did the hurt him? What did these people do to him? Goddamnit, why did they have to be with him _now_?! The smile, he wanted to give Kokichi, clearly dropped for a second but was put back on the next second.

_Not in front of my beloved._

“Sorry, am I coming at the wrong time? I just wanted to see Oma-kun for a second.”, Shuichi forced himself to be as polite as possible, especially when his beloved was present. He didn’t want Kokichi to think that Shuichi is a bad person or something. He was desperate on being the best, just for Kokichi.

The two people had loosen their grip on the smaller one and took a step away from him. Both with a look of dissatisfaction of Shuichis presence. And, of course, Shuichi immediately noticed their hostility towards him. But Shuichi didn’t really care about any of these people in the classroom, only for Kokichi Oma.

Kokichis face turned to Shuichi and as soon as their eyes met, Shuichi already forgot about anyone else. Gold meeting Purple. The purple eyes were always drawing Shuichi into themselves. He would get lost in these eyes again. Ahh, If he just could make him his. If Kokichi Oma would just belong to Shuichi Saiharas.

_Not yet, not yet._

Shuichis fantasy about the other boy grew too large, he almost started drooling. _Again_.

“…hara-san? Saihara-san? U-Uhm…-“

Shuichi suddenly got back into reality. He should seriously stop spacing out all the time when he thinks of Kokichi. His gaze was still fixated on the boy, who now had moved himself in front of Shuichi.

_He is right there. Look at him. Isn’t he perfect? This is an angel._

“Oma-kun, I just wanted to thank you for that one time, when you nursed me.”

Shuichi pressed the little package into Kokichis hands, and of course, Shuichi wanted to get a touch on how these hands feel. He _’accidently’_ brushed his hands on Kokichis…

_They are so soft._

An honest smile was showing on Shuichis face, as he watched Kokichi getting flustered and blushing up to his ears. They were so cute. He was so cute. Oma Kokichi was so cute.

“Y-You know, this wasn’t necessary… u-uhm… s…since the nurse w-wasn’t present, I just… thought I would help you out, so-“, Kokichi wasn’t finished speaking when he got interrupted.

“And who are you, if I might ask? I already met you in the corridor, haven’t I?”

Shuichi moved his head to the person who dared to interrupt the angel talking. His eyes landed on a boy. Green hair, stylish, looks rich. But most importantly, his eyes. His poisonous, cold, green eyes he gave Shuichi back in the corridor. He didn’t show them anymore.

_Well, that’s odd._

“Amami-kun, this is-“, Again, Kokichi wanted to talk but got interrupted.

“Yo! Shuichi, my bro!”

_Do you guys even realize what you’re doing?! LET. HIM. TALK._

Another tall figure approaches the group. Immediately the lilac goatee caught the attention of Shuichi and he sighs in disappointment.

“Yeah, Momota-kun? I am sorry, I am here for Oma-kun and not you.”  
Visibly hurt by Shuichis statement Kaito moved his head away from the group. His hand moved up to the back of his own head. He looked like a kicked puppy now.

“Sorry, I just thought that we might be friends, since you helped me hooking up with my girl.”, he said, answering to Shuichis statement.

“Oh. You mean Harukawa? Yeah, Yeah, I just told you that she had an obvious crush on you. You should have figured it by yourself if you would have been more thoughtful about the situation. But, oh well, good ol’ you needed my help. Whatever, you got what you wanted, right? Like I said, I am here for Oma-kun.”

Shuichi gave a straight forward answer. Kaito was kinda baffled about how the seemingly shy and soft Shuichi just literally gave him the cold shoulder and turning his attention to Kokichi. He even ignored Rantaros previous question.

But Shuichi didn’t care enough to maintain the friendship with Kaito, nor does he want to make the green boy his friend. He just wants Kokichi.

_Kaito is a bully anyways. Am I supposed to care? And this A_ _mami-dude, or whatever Kokichi called him, gives me weird vibes aswell. I can’t let these people be around Kokichi anymore. He only needs me anyways._

Shuichi just wants to give Kokichi his full attention. He would have deserved even more but Shuichi could have only give him that much.

“Let’s talk somewhere else, the others are annoying.”, Shuichi said while he grabbed Kokichis small, soft hand and dragged him away from the classroom. There wasn’t much time left for lunch break but it would have been enough for him to talk to Kokichi and ask him to hang out.

The smaller boy didn’t put much of a fight, when he got dragged away by Shuichi, leaving his classmates. He could still hear Rantaro calling out Kokichis name. Kokichis given name. How dare he? Were they close? Whatever they are, Shuichi promised himself that he would make the relationship between him and Kokichi even closer than the one he has with Rantaro.

Luckily there wasn’t a single soul on Shuichis favorite spot, the rooftop. He dragged Kokichi with him, then stopping, as soon as they both entered the spot. Shuichi was very confident right now but he was still afraid that Kokichi might not want to hang out tomorrow.

_Then make him want it. Make him yours. He is yours._

_If Kokichi doesn’t want to, I just need to make sure nobody else hangs out with him. If I can’t have you, no one can._

“So… you wanted… t-to talk?”, the soft voice of the other boy broke the silence they had. Shuichi must have been spacing out again. Really, he should try to get rid of this habit.

“Yeah. Wanna hang out tomorrow? I really wanna pay back everything you did for me, Oma-kun.”

It seems that Shuichi had caught Kokichi off guard. The smaller one immediately got flustered and blushing all over the place when Shuichi asked to hang out. It was just really cute seeing Kokichis cheek turning red, the redness wandering up to his ears and his eyes facing away from Shuichi.

“A-are you sure that… t-that you want to hang out with… _me?_” Kokichi made it sound like it would be a bad thing to hang out with him. But why? Kokichi is perfect, so why would he be so unsure about it?

_Ahh. I shouldn’t be asking this. Kokichi is perfect the way he is, even if he was unsure about himself. I shouldn’t question it._

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.”, a soft smile decorated Shuichis face now. This smile was only for Kokichi to see. Then Shuichi continued: “Tomorrow after school, let’s go to the city, okay? A new café had opened and I heard they are selling really good waffles.” Shuichi knew that Kokichi likes sweets, so he made an offer which Kokichi just _can’t _decline. And just as planned, Kokichis eyes started to spark a little bit when he mentioned waffles. It was so cute.

“I-I didn’t know you like sweets, S-Saihara-kun… uhm… I would like t-to hang out tomorrow…” Kokichi looked up to Shuichi, giving him a big, happy and excited smile. He was _really_ happy. Just thanks to Shuichi.

Shuichi felt his face heat up. What’s that feeling exactly? It isn’t too hot outside right now, so was this his body? Was this his body reacting to Kokichi? It isn’t like Kokichi never gave his body a reaction, in fact, Shuichis pants would sometimes feel really tight, especially between his legs. Even now he could feel his pants slowly getting more tight.

But this feeling right now was new. The heat on his face was irritating. Perplexed over the situation, Shuichi turned his face away, attempting to hide his face.

_Oh, I must be blushing because of Kokichi. Yeah, just this happy smile gives me a rush of euphoria. I am so happy. Doesn’t this proof my love for Kokichi now? I am in love with Kokichi!_

“Then tomorrow after school I’ll be waiting in front of your classroom, Oma-kun” Shuichi spoke and turned his face back to Kokichis. That is, when the bell rang.

Lunch is over.

* * *

Kokichi remembered, when he returned to class he saw Kaito mocking Rantaro again. They didn’t even seem to notice that he was back or that lunch was over. They kept their fight going on. Even during class they keep glancing at each other with hostility. But Kokichi was able to calm down Rantaro, just by tugging on his sleeve and giving him an upset frown. That would always make Rantaro give in and feeling bad for his actions. The first time Kokichi used his upset frown, he was mad at Rantaro for fighting with Kaito. After that Rantaro spend a full week apologizing to Kokichi, even if he already told him on the first apology that it’s fine.

Now looking at Rantaro, he looks like a kicked puppy. Kokichi hates using this technique but then, of course, Rantaro would stop fighting and that was worth it.

After class was dismissed, Rantaro started to apologize to Kokichi, over and over. Just like the first time using the upset frown. He would continue apologizing on their way to the train station. Even when Rantaro entered the train, he looked out of the window, with a guilty face.

Rantaros train came 10minutes earlier than Kokichis. They used to take the same train but that was before Rantaro moved to the other side of the city. His parents got divorced and Rantaro moved in at his fathers place with his new step mother, while his sisters went with his mom. They would still be living in Rantaros old house and his sisters would still go to school with their brother. Rantaro would still be able to take the same train as Kokichi and go visit his mom once in a while.

But then, a few months had passed and the sisters didn’t show up at school anymore. The house they were living in was sold to a new couple and they were already moving in, when Rantaro and Kokichi went to check on his sisters.

Kokichi never felt so surprised. He thought his friends mother and sisters would at least tell Rantaro that they are going to move away. But they didn’t. They didn’t even bother looking at his messages he sent them. Rantaro stopped sending messages after a reply.

_”This number you have reached is not in service anymore. You may press 1 for more options.”_

After that Rantaro was devastated and didn’t come to school for three days.

Kokichi let out a sigh. Why was he thinking about that? He felt bad for making Rantaro feel guilty now, but it couldn’t be helped. He would end up fighting Kaito again and Kokichi wanted to prevent that. 

“Kichi!”

Speak of the devil…

Kaito pushed himself between the waiting people at the train station. His lips show a wolfish grin, it made Kokichi shiver. Right behind Kaito was a girl following and holding his hand. Her red eyes were fixated on Kokichi, she was observing every move he made. His hand slipped inside of his schoolbag, grabbing the package that Shuichi gave him. He decided to open it at home. 

Kokichi didn’t want any more trouble. Not with Kaito, now that he has his girlfriend. The tall boy is a bully and everyone knew that. If someone would claim that Kaito is a nice and caring person, they would be either absolutely blind or just really dumb. Perhaps even lying to themselves.

His girlfriend, Harukawa Maki, didn’t say anything when Kaito stopped in front of the small boy with a sadistic grin. She only stood there, giving the small boy glances full of death wishes. The two of them only had a conversation once, and that was when Kaito and her got together. She saw Kaito in classroom 1b, mocking and pushing Kokichi for being the shortest boy in class. She would dash into the classroom, angry at Kokichi. For taking Kaitos attention, which was supposed to be given to her. She was, for real, jealous at Kokichi because Kaito was bullying him?

Maki had pushed Kaito aside and grabbed Kokichi by his hair and pulling them up, forcing him to make eye-contact with deadly, bloody-red eyes. He can still remember the feeling of murderous intention creeping up his spine. And if that wasn’t enough intimidating, Kokichi could have sworn seeing her long, black pig tails standing up, like a cats fur puffing up in fury.

He felt like he was going to die for real.

But that wasn’t it.

“What the fuck? You’re giving this snot your attention? He looks so pathetic.”, She said, speaking to Kaito instead to Kokichi. Her eyes were still glued to Kokichi, who desperately tries to free himself from Makis strong grip. It hurt having his hair pulled like this, he couldn’t help but burst into tears on that day. As if he didn’t look pathetic enough, he started sobbing and shedding tears underneath Makis fist holding onto his purple hair.

“You midget better don’t fuck with Kaito because he is mine. And I don’t care if he approaches you, it’s still your fault for existing and being a pathetic and easy target. You’re better off dead.”

Makis voice felt ice cold. For every word leaving her mouth it felt like he was being stabbed by an icicle. Trembling in fear, he couldn’t really do anything but look at her with horror in his eyes. How can a person hold such a murderous grudge against him for being bullied? Didn’t she see that he was already a target for literally anyone in school for being a weak and small boy?

His tears didn’t stop, his whole body was shaking but he wanted to say something to her so badly. But he was weak. Too weak. Mentally. Physically. Just his whole being was a joke. He shut his eyes close. He didn’t want to see anyone anymore. He just wanted to find peace behind the darkness of his eyelids.

  
  
_"Kokichi, dear” a young woman bend over in front of him, smiling with courage, even if her left cheek was covered with a bandage and her chin had a bruise. “Mama thinks you’re the strongest person ever. And you know why?” he shook his head. Why would she think that? ”Your eyes are telling me. They show a strong will to fight and to live. People might have their flaws, my little, but remember that mistakes can be lessons for you to learn and improve.”_

He wanted to believe her. He wanted to believe his mothers words, even if he didn’t even remember her face anymore.

“…Not gonna die! You’ll have to kill me then!!”

Who said that? It’s a familiar voice, but somehow he had never heard it before as well.

Kokichi opened his eyes to see the owner of the voice but only realized he himself shouted them at his bullies. But he never shouted… right? They all looked at him with a perplexed expression.

’Did that midget seriously yell at them?’

Kokichi could tell that they all were thinking that. Nobody said anything, they were just too surprised. Kokichi himself didn’t believe what he had done. That he managed to shout without stuttering or losing his voice mid-sentence.

“I’ll kill you then.”

The next thing Kokichi remembered is him being hold mid-air and hearing a window opening. He felt the warm breeze of summer-air hitting his back until he himself was completely covered by it. He was pushed over the window but didn’t fall. His body peeked outside, making him visible from far away. Maki was still holding his hair strong in her fist. It hurt.

He could hear screams down below him and students shouting in horror.

“He is gonna fall! Oh my god, SOMEONE TELL A TEACHER!”

“Fuuuck, isn’t that Oma from class 1b? So he finally…”

“What the fuck?! You say this is suicide?!”

“This is horrible! BOY!! STOP DOING THIS!!”

“Yeah!! Instead, DO A BACKFLIP!”

Kokichi turned his head as much as he could and saw students gathering. Nobody went to get a teacher. They all wanted to watch too badly. He recognized some of the students watching him. One he immediately recognized. Blonde hair, pink eyes, a cute clef-hairpin holding her long hair away from her face. It was Rantaros girlfriend, Akamatsu Kaede. She didn’t really give any reaction at all, just staring blankly at the scene happening. Right next to her he saw long, blue hair, glasses sitting on the nose of that person and her face filled with horror. He only saw that girl once with Kaede.

Some other students were showing a shocking expression but no one tried to help. Some even joked about Kokichi really jumping, as if they didn’t see that someone pushed him and holding him at place He felt humiliated and angry. None of the students ever tried to help him, they just watched it happening, filling their egoistic need for enjoyment. They were relieved that this wasn’t happening to them but to Kokichi.

“So, are you ready to die, midget?”, Maki spoke, loosening her grip a little bit. Suddenly fear rushed over his whole body. Is she seriously planning to let go of him?! Is she insane?

Kokichi didn’t know what to say, he was still trembling in fear. He just managed to push these words out of himself:

“Not ready…”

“Maki roll, isn’t this too much?”

“y-yeah, what if he is really going to die?”

“You’d be targeted for murdering him, y’know?”

“So what? We could just stay we wanted to hold him back but he resisted and jumped. What’s so difficult to lie?”

Maki was about to let go of the small boy, when the door flung open and someone shouting in anger.

Of course, it was Rantaro.

But he might be too late because Kokichi felt Makis grib completely loosen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont forget that there are people who want to help you with your situation. if you cant find anyone, I might aswell offer myself to help you and be your friend as best as I can :) stay safe, readers!
> 
> \- SU


	4. A new friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a bit slow to update at the moment. I'll try to keep the chapters a biiit longer :)

The sky would start to spin and his body was totally free from the pain Maki caused him to feel. Kokichi did pick up muffled voices but he couldn’t figure out what they were saying, he was just too focused on looking at the blue sky above him. Mesmerized from the feeling of absolute freedom overwhelmed the small boy. It felt like he was flying.

Oh, wait.

He was.

A hand tried to grasp Kokichi but it only manages to grip some merely air.

_”STOP!!!”_

** _Crashing_ **

_Ouch, that hurt._

* * *

The next thing Kokichi remembered was that he had been in the hospital for a long time. He didn’t break any bones when he fell from the window, which was thanks to the bushes underneath the window. Rantaro would be the only one who came to visit him. Sometimes he would bring Kaede, but only because they were planning on going on a date anyways.

Kokichi never looked her in the eyes ever since. He still remembered her face showing no reaction at all when Kokichi was hanging out of the window. Even though Kokichi is her boyfriends best friend, she doesn’t show any empathy for him at all. Perhaps she wanted Kokichi to die as well. Nobody could tell but Kaede herself.

After a week Kokichi left the hospital and went back to the disaster he called home. It didn’t took long to get Kokichi back to his usual routine.

Coming home, taking off his shoes, seeing his father lying on the couch, glancing at the beer in his fathers hand, giving him a silent greeting, going upstairs to his room and wait until his father bursts in, very drunk and taking anger out using Kokichis body like a punching bag, nursing himself and then spend his entire night on the phone. Kokichi would get punches so hard, his body was just full of bruises and injuries. But he managed to hide them very well. Not like it would matter, since most student won’t even give him a glance.

Kokichis school days were really tough after that incident. He would always try to avoid Kaito as much as possible, run away and hide at the most ridicules places. Whenever he sees Maki, he froze and was unable to move. Even if she didn’t seem to bother his presence anymore, he could still feel her murderous eyes drilling into his body and tearing him apart.

Students would make fun of Kokichi for trying to attempt suicide but failing to do so. Calling him more names than they used to and sometimes jokingly asking him if he needs a hand to kill himself.

Now, since the incident had happened a while ago, people stopped talking about it more and more, which relieved the small boy a lot. He couldn’t bear to go to school anymore and he also didn’t want to stay home. Rantaro would have been an option, but even Rantaro wasn’t always available for Kokichi. He has a girlfriend and if that’s not reason enough, Rantaro did so much for Kokichi, he would only feel bad if he did even more for him.

* * *

Still to this day Kokichi feared Maki. He feels like she would try to push him from the window again because Kaito had decided to come over and tease him with whatever comes up in his mind. Perhaps she considered pushing him onto the rails today? Maybe these two were here because they want to push Kokichi in front of a racing train?

“Kichi!”, Kaito shouted, drawing all the attention. Kaito and Maki had made their way to Kokichi, who was only able to stay frozen and watch them approach him until they both finally stopped their pace as they stood right in front of the small boy.

“What do you need…?”, Kokichi silently asked the tall boy. He couldn’t bring himself to look up, since he was mentally preparing to die.

It was silent for a few seconds but Kaito started to speak up. “How was your day, Kichi?”

It was weird. Kaito asking him how his day was. Kaito, his bully, asked him how his day was. This seemed too fishy. Kokichi was sure, Kaito would start bullying him if he didn’t give the correct answer.

Kokichi looked up in confusion. Somehow Kokichi expected Kaito to punch him as soon as their eyes meet but that wasn’t the case. Kaito actually gave him a weirdly warm smile, just like Maki. This was too… too weird. Kokichi couldn’t bring himself to talk anymore.

“You didn’t answer my question, Kichi. How was your day?”, Kaito asked again. It seemed like he _really _was interested for the answer. Still, deep down Kokichi knows, this was probably just an act. But he couldn’t pinpoint what these two exactly need from him. Why are they acting all friendly now?

“I-it… was… okay…?”, Kokichi answered hesitantly. Surprisingly Kaito gave a satisfied sigh. Now Kaito started asking how he was doing, about the weather, asking how he does in school, and all that, pushing the small boy to talk to him.

Kokichi never realized that the three of them entered the train, continuing their small talk… or at least trying to. Kokichis answers were short and quick. He never intended to give these two full paragraphs on how his day was or how beautiful the weather is today. The small boy was just too cautious around these two.

To his surprise, nothing happened. Kaito and Maki were really only talking to him. Strangely they even joked around a little bit, not in an offensive way but… really, some jokes were funny, that even Kokichi had to giggle a few times.

As time goes on, Kokichi arrived at home. When he grabbed the doorknob to open the door, all his muscles tensed up in wary from what is lingering behind this closed door. In a slow pace, Kokichi opens the door and enters the dark corridor of the house.

“welcome home, Kokichi.”

* * *

**7:27AM.**

No sign of Oma Kokichi.

Even though today Kokichi and Shuichi had been planning on having waffles after school, it couldn't occur if Kokichi doesn’t show up at school at all. Shuichi keeps glancing out of the window. His desk was placed perfectly for him to have a full view on the front gate of the school. Which means he can see whenever someone leaves or enters the terrain. But the only thing he wants to see was Kokichi.

He still hadn’t shown up.

School went on like forever and Shuichi was just dragging himself through the day until the last bell rang, officially ending the school day. Without Kokichi the world felt so mundane. Boring. Ugly. Terrible. Lonely.

_Did something happen? Should I go and check? Should I wait in front of his classroom? I wanna see Kokichi, I wanna see him, IwannaseehimIwannaseehimIwanna-_

Shuichi snapped back into reality, realizing he now stood in front of his beloved classroom. Without hesitation Shuichi peeked inside, to check for his beloved Kokichi. And there he was, still sitting on his desk and waiting for others to leave first. His books weren’t put in Kokichis bag but instead were lying spread on his desk.

_How did he got there? I was sure, I checked the gate._  
  
  


Shuichi notices that his left cheek had been patched up and Kokichi himself didn’t look too happy. Something must have happened.  
And Shuichi had to investigate this.

Kokichi finally began to put away his books in his bag. As he stood up, he moved the chair to his desk, then glances over to the door. Immediately his eyes stopped by Shuichi, he moved quickly towards him and smiling slightly.

_Odd._

  
The taller boy inspected Kokichi, especially his cheek. Does he have more bruises?

“Oh… this”, Kokichi had noticed Shuichis stare fixating on the patched up cheek. The small boy put his hand on the patch. “I fell down, was pretty clumsy. Don’t worry.”  


Obviously, Shuichi didn’t believe this claim. There must have been something happening. Was it Kaito? Again, he felt rage growing inside of him, imagining Kaito landed a punch on such a cute face. On Kokichis face. On _his beloved face._

Shuichi put his hand on Kokichis, which remained on the patch. Whoever was hurting this boy, he is going to find this person. Because nobody lays a hand on _his beloved Kokichi_.

“If there is anything I can help you with, tell me. I’ll be there for you.”, Shuichi spoke, making the other boy blush intensively.

“Yeah… thanks, Saihara-kun”, A sweet smile from an angel was given to Shuichi.

* * *

The scent of coffee filled Kokichis nose as they entered the new opened café. It wasn’t big but a lovely place to be at. People chattering in a modest volume, waitresses and waiters were smiling at every guest they had and welcomed them. Shuichi took a seat next to the window, in front of him Kokichi sat down with a slightly nervous expression.

The small boy had never been to such a happy place. Moreover, it was an expensive place to eat and drink. Kokichi didn’t think about the prices of the products before he got there, which made him feel even worse. What if he didn’t have enough money to pay for his stuff? Could he even afford _any_ of the foods and drinks this place was offering? As he picked up the menu and reviewed the prices, he was baffled. The waffels Shuichi wanted to eat were the most expensive on the menu.

But now there is no going back. He agreed with Shuichi to eat waffles together, so it would look like a cheap excuse if he told Shuichi he doesn’t have enough money with him. But that’s the truth.

Kokichi gripped tightly on the menu and stared at it with an anxious expression.

What if Shuichi thinks he is weird for being poor? What if he doesn’t want to be friends with Kokichi anymore? What is he thinks Kokichi is acting weird because his anxiety is getting bigger and bigger? He is the first person who approached Kokichi! He couldn’t afford to let Saihara Shuichi go anymore.

“Oma-kun, I am paying. Don’t worry. I am the one who asked you to be here, right?” Shuichi gave a smile and carefully took the menu out of Kokichis hands.

“y-yeah, but still-“

“You don’t have to feel bad about it, Oma-kun. I am happy that you agreed to come with me, you know? Just that is more than enough payback… Ah, your face is all tensed up, you look funny.”  
A chuckle coming from Shuichi had lighten up Kokichi a bit, but he felt his face heating up as Shuichi mentioned how he looked.

“S-stop laughing! This- I- s-stop!” Kokichi put his hands in front on his face, covering them while the taller boy continued laughing sweetly. Oh, this made Kokichi blush even more.

“I am sorry, I am sorry~ please, forgive me, I’ll do anything.”

“…anything? Then-“

Kokichis demand was cut off by the waiters voice interrupting them.

“Hello! May I take your ord… wait, is that you, K-Kokichi?”

The named boy raised his head to look at the waiter, bewildered over the fact that he knew Kokichis given name and called him by it.  
Green, wavy hair, matching to green eyes. Long lashes gave the green eyes a feminine look. Even so, the whole appereance of the waiter appeared very attractive. Kokichi then recognizes the waiter.

“Amami-kun… y-you work here?”

“Yeah, I do. It’s just a part time job, so I am not here very often. But meeting you here must have been fate, don’t you think?”  
Kokichi gave a relieved sigh, as the unknown waiter turned out to be his only school friend, Amami Rantaro.

“I guess it probably was fate, haha. Oh, I don’t wanna bother you at work, Amami-kun. W-we should order, Saihara-kun…”

Kokichi glanced over to Shuichi. He noticed Shuichis cap being pulled down, to cover the eyes and giving minimal view onto them. As if he didn’t want anyone seeing his eyes. Even Rantaro wouldn't say anything towards Shuichi, just staring at him with a weird look in his eyes. There sure was a feeling of hostility between Shuichi and Rantaro.

“S-Saihara-kun?”

“Yeah, sure. We’ll take two of your ‘super waffles’ and a coffee for me please. What about you, Oma-kun? What do you want to drink?”  


  
“O-oh! Do you guys sell… g-grape panta…?”

* * *

The waffles were delicious. Covered in sweet whipped cream, seasonal berries and fruits were put on the cream to give it a colorful look.   
Kokichi was surprised by how caring and gentle Shuichi was behaving towards him, even though the small boy was sure that he was upset when Rantaro showed up. Did this really bother him _that_ much?  
Or did Kokichi do something wrong?  
Perhaps Shuichi suddenly had a change of heart and hates him now because he realized how shitty Kokichi really is and doesn’t want to be seen with someone who is even worse that trash?

Nevertheless, Shuichi was taking care of Kokichi with such gentle and patience. The taller boy would always give Kokichi a sweet smile, whenever his clumsy hands tried to pick a blueberry with his fork but instead sent it flying to another table. He would laugh at his shitty jokes and he gave him such a gentle smile whenever Kokichi raised his head to look at the other boy. Kokichi had never felt so save in his life.

As well had he never felt so sad about leaving such a crowded place.  
Kokichi looked back at the café with a wide, happy smile as the both of them walked back home.

“Y-you didn’t have to pay for me, Saihara-kun…”

“It’s fine. You don’t have to pay back either. You see… I had a lot of fun today. Ah… who was this guy exactly? That ‘Amami’?”

Shuichis pace slowed down, automatically Kokichi adjusted his own pace to Shuichis.

“Amami-kun is my friend… w-well, like… m-my only friend at school. W-we don’t do a lot together b-because his girlfri-“

“Ah, he has a girlfriend? Yeah, I remember. They are this super popular couple at school, how did you manage to befriend someone as popular as Amami Rantaro?”

“Ah… y-you see, we grew up together, we used to be neighbors… b-but now… he moved away… but it doesn’t bother me, that he isn’t around! I-I think that, i-if he would still be my neighbor, I wouldn’t be able to grow as a person… I… I guess that I would have been sticking on Amami-kun all day, if he hadn’t moved away… and he would… have probably think of me as an annoyance for not leaving him alone...“, Kokichi went silent and stopped his pace, letting his head drop. His eyes fixated to his feet. The thought that Rantaro might really think of him as an annoyance,_ an embarrassment_, **_trash_**, **_rat_**, <strike>**_useless child_**</strike> made Kokichi frown.

“Oma-kun”, the voice of the taller boy reached Kokichi as he was deep in thoughts.  
“You’re not useless. There is a reason why a lot of people ask you to do their stuff, right? You aren’t useless, if people keep coming to you and ask for help. Like the baseball-team you helped the other day.”  
Kokichi felt a warm touch on his left cheek. The small boy recognizes them as sweaty palms cupping his cheek, an intimate movement from Shuichi. As he raised his head, his eyes instantly caught up to Shuichis pair of golden orbs. They were looking at him with such gentle… and an unknowing feeling of unsettledness. Shuichis observing eyes remained on the smaller boy, reading his every move, which might aswell explain why Shuichi always seems to know what was troubling Kokichi.

“And if you weren’t present on that day… if you were useless and nobody asked you to be helping out… You… I-I… we… we would have never met!”

The dusky sky shone in a reddish tone upon the city, when the two boys completely stopped moving. With their faces now only centimeters separating the two boys, Kokichi easily noticed the reddish color on Shuichis face. Kokichi never noticed the sun setting. He must have been tangled deeply into the conversation with the other boy, that he literally forgot the whole world around him. Where were they anyways?

“S-Saihara-kun?!”

The smaller boy flinched, surprised by the sudden movement of the other boy as he decreases the small gap keeping them apart. His hand removed from his cheek, only to be placed on both of Kokichis shoulders. Like he was trying to keep Kokichi at place with a strong grip.

“Saihara-kun, stop!”, Kokichi felt a heatwave flooding up to his face. With squinted eyes, Kokichi turned his head sideways. Shuichi didn’t stop decreasing the space between them.

“Oma-kun…”

Warmth completely covered Kokichi. Hesitantly the eyes opened, showing the purple orbs again.  
The taller boy was wrapping his arms around Kokichis small torso and pressing their bodies against each other.  
Their chests squeezed at each other let him feel Shuichis heartbeat. Shuichi probably felt Kokichis fastening heartbeat aswell. But atop of that, warm breath hit Kokichis left ear as Shuichi inhaled deeply and exhaled with a soft sigh. The heat on Kokichis face didn’t disappear. It got hotter.

“I want to be your friend. Please… Kokichi.”

Oh. Kokichi would have been dropping on his knees. The silent voice whispering his given name into his ear, this made Kokichi melt. _Was this really it?_  
Small hands clenching on the dark jacket of the taller boy and squeezing him, as an attempt to keep the boy at place. The unknown, warm feeling completely covered the small boy. It wasn’t exactly a bad feeling. But unknown. Perhaps a tiny little bit bad.

“Sure… Saihara-kun.“

* * *

_He fell for it._

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
Leave a comment, if there was anything you wanted to critize, I am open for it :))


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